Lonely Afternoon

…can be so painful and joyous at the same time.

Distributor #1: Called mainline but nobody picks up 24/7. Managed to get the email of in-charge but still no reply despite numerous calls to DID. Neither does emails and voicemails work. Prefer this distributor because of cosmic reasons, but I really feel like I’m banging head on wall.

Distributor #2: Contact person remembered my name after I emailed him once, and greeted me in friendly fashion when I called him. Things are such that I can drop by anytime once my music is done.

Truth is my music wrapped up on 10 Sept 07!

Imagine I’ve waited 2 weeks for #1! Like a faithful puppy, but there’s no reply at all. Worse than the sound of silence.

Finally decided to go and see distributor #2 tomorrow morning.

Artwork design will go full-force this Sat. (",)

SO, release date will be delayed, but well, c’est bien lah!

:15 June 2007:

"Lonely Afternoon" is the first bossa nova song I composed while plonking on my piano one lonely afternoon in 2001. This is the first song that came to mind when I decided to do an ep album. 

The funny thing is, most of the songs I love are composed using that old and out of tune piano I so hate when I was a child.

I can’t explain, but I had a bout of good luck:

#1: A good friend Kangyang agreed to re-arrange the song and dress it with a set of brand new kick-ass chords. It took a lot of his time, but it was definitely worth it for what he whipped up. Somehow, either one of us I forgot who (the crazier for sure), decided we’ve got to do one part of it in samba. And we did it!

#2: I was fortunate to be able to get Jamie Wilson to play the rhythm and the solo guitars for the song. For those who didn’t know who he is, he is one revered guitarist in the Taiwan pop music scene, and to witness him record the song in lightning speed and accuracy was simply jaw-dropping.

He did one steel rhythm and one nylon rhythm guitar which were then panned L-R. When it came to the solo lines, it was freaking great, especially the last track when he just ‘free-styled’ without stopping. *kudos*

Another good friend came up with the percussion for the song (and the samba drums turned out to be another challenge) while kangyang did the bass guitar.

And this, will also be the title of my album, with the pure hope that you’ll find the songs suitable for your listening pleasure when you’re alone or lonely during any afternoon.

:February 2007:

I’ve always loved to sing both English and Mandarin songs since young. I remember fondly the times I spent singing to classics like "Casanova", "The one you love", and Mandarin classics like "最后一夜" by 蔡琴 ，"细水长流" by 梁文福 etc etc, at the backseat of my dad’s car. The first cassette tape I asked my dad to buy for me at 10 years old was "Bad" by Michael Jackson and I still remember the exhilaration experienced when the heavy drums hit me.

We all understand the issue of bilingualism in Singapore - if you’re a Chinese educated in Singapore, you are either better in english, or in chinese. If you reckon you are truly equally proficient in both, then you belong to the 1% of the whole population (statistics from yours truly). But the truth is, these people along this spectrum can understand both languages (only differ in level of understanding). The only thing I should be concerned about is, preference.

The issue of which language to take for this ep tore me apart at the very beginning. Because if I can’t even come to a decision, then nothing can start. But as a cafe-pub-wedding singer, I am used to singing a mixture of English and Mandarin songs at any one performance, and I wasn’t trained to be choosy. So when the time came for me to choose, I was so lost. My initial decision was to do all English because I’ve been composing English songs for the past 3 years.

But one day, a friend Peter sat me down in Jurong Point’s KFC for 2 whole hours to analyse for me why I should do all Mandarin if I am capable of doing so. I don’t think I can ever forget it. The strongest emotion I felt was, fear. It was a tie between pragmatism, and artistic-fulfillment. Don’t misunderstand me - I love my Chinese songs, but I reckon I can find more creative sparks in the English ones.

After some struggles with none other than myself, I decided to do a cha-pa-lang album, and to add icing to the cake so to speak, add a French cherry to it.

I think I just want to do what I want to do, especially since I’m initiating this project and am not puppeted by any record label. So what’s up with the boundaries by myself? Like what Juliet said, I should rejoice in the fact that I have so many choices I can take, so let’s flow with it.

I never wanted to restrict myself to one genre or one language when I compose. It is not these that matter. What matters is the stories to be told through my songs.

That’s all I truly want.

:December 2006:

I love performing with a live band. Friends who often psycho me to sing KTV with them will meet with a flat refusal. One reason is singing has become ‘work’ for me it seems weird to head to a KTV room for recreation. Another big reason is I’ve become so used to live accompaniment and the ‘rush’ of hearing real instrument sounds, which pushes me to sing better.

Hence, with Fabrice leading the suggestion, I decided to look for a live band that was willing to play for the album. But to search for one really depends on so many factors, suitability being number one - a random search came up with a lot of metal, metal-rock, punk-rock bands which though lovely in their own rights, were certainly not what I had in mind.

By a stroke of good luck, Ein introduced me to Lyonel, a guitarist for local band TIEN. When I first hear their music on MySpace, I felt that I could take to them, and voila, c’est ça! The 5 guys were all very easy-going and encouraging, and most importantly, very positive about doing music. It wasn’t long before we meet up for our first jam @ Boon’s Studio. Things were great, and I was touched by how they tried to bring out my songs using their own arrangements.

As everybody was busy nearing the end of 2006, we scheduled to jam with each other again after New Year. However, by a twist of fate, I decided to call off the idea of having a live band for the album (reason has nothing to do with these cute guys!).

It was regretful, but a decision among many which I had to make.

Though getting a live band to play was out of the picture, I still resolved to make the music as ‘ live’  as possible. And now 9 months down the road, I can proudly say I’ve stuck to this as much as I could. (",)

The album will be out in late September, but sometimes I still catch myself asking this question when the answer has all along been very clear in my heart.

As a musician, there is no clear-cut corporate ladders to climb, no promotions to clinch, and let’s not even go into the subject of annual bonus. Truth is, I have overcome the envious feelings of hearing my good friends discuss their promotions and fat bonuses, and have come to terms with the fact that these are things I have to remove from my plate if I’m going to fill mine with the joy of doing music.

But one thing which escapes is that my friends attend courses regularly to upgrade themselves. To learn more is always wonderful; it makes one feel alive. And getting certificates, be it diplomas or masters can be very satisfying and signify a milestone in your personal education or career.

This is something I lack, and need. And so the idea arrived like a big fat raindrop that splashed on the back of my head, and I decided to just do this, for myself - as a mini-celebration (albeit a financially-damaging one) for plunging into music full-time for 5 years. 5 years may not seem a long time to some, but I’m counting my blessings to stay afloat and well.

Finally I can dress up my songs and contain them in tiny 12 by 12 plastics to be distributed all over Singapore. Sharing my songs and making them available and accessible to more people excited me, but the potential of learning so much more through this project thrilled me 10 folds.

And if I don’t do it now, then when?
And if I wait, the next question will be, what’s there to wait?
It feels so damn good to be in a position where I can decide for myself.
Yes it costs me a bomb, but spending on it is euphoric.